Every fan know that their team's performance depends on their particular actions during the game. They have to wear the right shirt, watch the game from the right chair, and do whatever magical ritual they have to do to get their team to win the game.

Apparently, what I have to do is drive to Northern Virginia and get completely blitzed at Oktoberfest. I have not been doing this every week, and for that I apologize.

To be fair, it's not entirely my fault. Two weeks ago I was driving across the country. I couldn't stop in the mountains of Colorado to pound beers. Last week I was home, but honestly, Montgomery County doesn't even let you sell beer in grocery stores - how was I to get shitfaced my first week in town?

This week, however, I did it right. Tape the game, out of the house by 11:30, and beer tasting out of a tiny pilsner glass by 12:30. It wasn't until the line for Rogue brewery that I fell behind a girl in a Carolina shirt who let me know that UNC had gone up "by like twenty" on Miami out of the gate. A couple of hours later we cross paths again, and sure enough, UNC has pulled off the upset, and I'm a very happy lush.

It's certainly better for my peace of mind that I didn't see the game the second half live. The entire second half was a slow progression towards UNC giving up the lead, only to be saved by a heroic defensive performance - for interceptions! - and Connor Barth's traditional Miami kicking performance. (UNC is undefeated against Miami in games where Barth attempts a field goal. Alas, that makes the Heels only 2-2 over his career.)

The vaunted Hurricane defens forgot to show, allowing 183 yards rushing, 162 of those in the first half. Elzy solidified his grasp of the starting running back job, with 134 total yards and an electrifying touchdown to start the first-half UNC rout. The second fumble in as many weeks is a little worrying, but why quibble? The Heels outrushed every other opponent of the Hurricanes this season- including Oklahoma.

UNC has had two solid games against ACC opponents after being blown out by South Florida. It's too early to tell whether this is a testament to the weakness in the conference or a sign Carolina is turning the corner. Next week's game agaist one-loss USC will go along way to tell; I'll get to work on ignoring the games and destroying my liver. It's the least I can do.